Tanzania.
That word has been floating around my brain since the 12th of May. Tanzania. I've been sitting on this post for quite sometime because frankly I haven't had the words to describe the feelings I have and the amazement I have for my God. Tanzania, WOW. I guess you can see that I got my assignment as well as my ministry partner. I don't know her name, but I am praising Jesus that he has blessed me with a sister in Christ to spend the next year of my life with. From just finishing college to moving to another country, God's plans never cease to surprise me and fill me with so much joy. I am so ready for this.
I've been reading through old journals lately since coming home after graduating college, it's weird and yet hilarious to see all the trivial things I worried over even just a month ago. And yet God has been faithful through it all, has carried me through the struggles and held my hand through the joys. He has always been there even the times I didn't feel him or didn't hear him, He's constantly been there and always will be. It's crazy to think how He continues to move me, I think He knows that my heart is everywhere and just wants to be with so many people. So He keeps moving and I keep following, and this path is leading me to Tanzania. (I wish you all could see the smile on my face).
Now this decision comes with some hardships, but it wouldn't be trusting in Him and having faith if I didn't have to let go of the things. A big part of me wanted to return to Uganda, really bad, and when I told my amazing friend Michael that I was going to Tanzania, his encouraging words were "I know you wanted Uganda, but I know God's got a plan for you." And those six words "God's got a plan for you," helped me realize that no matter where I go, and no matter what I'm doing, it's for God and it will never be in vain.
I'm also leaving three months earlier than I had planned, which means less time with my family and friends now, which is tough, I just got home and soon I'll be packing up and leaving and moving on. But the truth is I can't see myself doing anything else. This is where my heart is, helping God's people and it's taking me overseas, away from what I know is comfortable. But Christ doesn't call us to be comfortable, He calls us to become uncomfortable, to get into the nitty gritty of things, to go out to the destitute and love them, to pick up our cross, cast out our fear, and follow after Him.
I'm excited. I'm nervous. I'm ready. I'm waiting. This time right now is to become prepared, to dig deeper in my relationships with friends and family, but more importantly to dig deeper into my relationship with God, because when I leave here, He is the only foundation I've got. I am scared and sad to leave my family and friends. but I keep remembering to breathe in the Hope I have in the Lord and to breathe out my fear. Because with Him I can do all things. My strength alone will never be enough.
So right now I'm going to live in the now, soak in every moment I have with my family, take the trips I need to and go and visit my friends around Iowa, in Minnesota, Nebraska, South Dakota, Indiana, Canada, Philadelphia, and so on. Cause I don't know when I will see them again and I want each and every one of them how much I love them and how much they have blessed my life. And to let them know that I am here for them, though I'll be in another country, my heart is with them and so is my love. "Jesus said present time is where you live your life. heart open, each moment. no past- future worry- just loving in the now" -Ann Freeman Price. So that's what I'm going to do.
Love Recklessly, Follow Freely, and Shine Christ.
In awe of our God,
HIS and yours,
Cami
"Let me not pray to be sheltered from the dangers, but to be fearless in facing them. Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain, but for the heart to conquer it. Let me not crave in anxious fear to be saved, but hope for the patience to win my freedom. Grant me that I may not be a coward, feeling Your mercy in my success alone; but let me find the grasp of You hand in my failure" -Rabindranath Tagone.
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