Thursday, June 16, 2011

A New Journey

How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, "Your God reigns!" Isaiah 52:7

And so a new journey begins. In 11 hours I will embark on one of the biggest journeys of my life. Africa. It's been a dream of mine since I was eight years old to go to Africa, and here I am 12 years later and God has brought that dream to life. In all that He is, He never ceases to amaze me.

My life has been made up of tiny journeys combined to make bigger one, but this one takes it all. God knows deep down in my heart that this is where I want to spend my life, with the orphans and the widows, loving them with my every being. I love Him so much, even though times I am the worst person at showing it, He knows and I know that I love Him and will always love Him, nothing and nobody can ever take me or separate me from my Jesus. Everything I need is found in everything that He is.

I realize that throughout my life He has been building me up for moments like these. To be poured out, to live a life worthy of His calling. And I realize when I am not doing these things, when I am not pouring out my life for the Gospel and for Jesus Christ, my life is meaningless. It is something that I struggle with, but it is something that needs to reflect in every aspect of my life, like a diamond or a prism shining in every direction, every person, every part of my life and who I am.

“To get through the hardest journey we need take only one step at a time, but we must keep on stepping” God has been leading me by my right hand, guiding me, allowing me to take my steps and follow in His. Trust me their big feet to fill, but I've got the rest of my life to keep trying. :) Too often I get so focused on my destination I forget about the beauty of the Journey, the best part. The journey is what builds up, makes a warriors and lovers of God, it's how He test us, proves us, and refines us. That is the importance of our journeys and with God guiding us we won't ever be lost.

So here I begin a new journey, but when this one ends I know there will be a brand new one waiting at the next turn, because God always has a plan, He knows exactly what He is doing. And with my Beloved, there is no doubt at the very end of this journey I will be in my King's arms, dancing in streets of gold, full of joy and love, for the Man who has won my heart for now and all eternity.

HIS and yours,


Saturday, June 11, 2011

1 Week; Dependent

"If you are a child of the King, nothing on this earth can satisfy you...nothing"
- Paul Washer

The time is coming closer. Soon I will be united with my team members in Florida, I can't wait to see all of them, train, and then before we know it we will be flying to Africa. A lot has happened in the time I have been home. I've gotten to see new friends, old friends, lots of baseball, and spend time with my family. But not only that, I've seen God work in amazing and unexplainable ways. My dad keeps asking me "how big is your faith?" Usually I say big, but I know it's nowhere near as big as my God is. I'm learning to be dependent on Him and only Him and put all of my trust in Him.

I know there is no way I, by myself, can prepare for this trip. The truth is I'm taking a good look at the person in the mirror, because I know once I step on that plane I won't ever be the same. I keep worrying about the money and the material things and the plane tickets. But this all worldly things that will be taken care of by the One who controls this world. I need to stop looking at the worldly things, instead I need to look more to my Father in Heaven, because He has provided everything I need.

"You must stop looking on the wrong side of things... Lift your hearts to heavenly places and look down upon events from that vantage point. You will see life's temporary sufferings as a gathering of pearls and jewels with which we will be adorned in eternity." -Richard Wurmbrand.

I know that I am going to love wherever God takes me for the summer as well as for the rest of my life. I am dependent on Him. Nothing on this earth can satisfy my hunger and my thirst. For God gives me living water, water that goes deep that never runs dry. Where this world will someday run dry, but as I look ahead, as I run this race marked out, I know I am running toward the Heavenly goal. The path, the place, the race that He has marked out for me.

Jesus has all I need in this life and eternity. Nothing can or ever will change that. The worlds got nothing on my Jesus. And He has me in the shelter of His wings guiding me towards my goal and into His Kingdom. And I can't wait until that day. But until then I will attain my place here on earth. Seeking, Loving, and Waiting for the day when He will return for His bride.

I can't wait to see what's in store for the summer.
I can't wait to see what's in store for the rest of my life.
But I know that whatever it is and wherever I go, the Lord, my God will be with me every step of the way.

HIS and yours,


Dependent on You
By: Jon Thurlow

Surely I’ve calmed and quieted my soul
Like a child press against his mother
Surely I’ve calmed and quiet my soul

And there’s not a care in the world
when I am trusting You completely
And there’s not a care in the world
when I am trusting You completely

So help me to trust You and
Help my unbelief
I, I wanna be dependent on
I wanna be dependent on You

Psalms 131
Surely I have behaved and quieted myself, as a child that is weaned of his mother: my soul is even as a weaned child.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Two weeks

In two short weeks I will be leaving home and headed to Africa. Words cannot even explain the excitement I am feeling in my heart right now. The fact that I am going to be living out my dream in two short weeks has not yet hit me and I don't know what will happen when it does. A lot has been going on in this short month that I have been home. Many battles within myself and also among people. It's hard to come back to my "hometown" because I know I do not belong here anymore. That it is time for me to move on from this place and the people here. God is calling me somewhere else and I want to be where He takes me, because in all truth, that is where I belong.

I can constantly feel myself changing and growing. A guy I have a couple classes wrote this "Christian spirituality is like jazz music. Loving Jesus is something you feel. It is something very difficult to get on paper. But it is no less real, no less meaningful, no less beautiful." That is the best way to describe me. I feel Christ moving through me, guiding me, showing me where I am supposed to be. And sometimes it gets tough, because the world does not understand. God deliberately chooses things the world considers foolish. Because God is not of this world and neither are we. We are designed to love and dwell with our King.

"Men choose a religion, but a Christian is chosen by Jesus Christ. To be a Christian means to belong to Christ. Jesus asked me to renounce even my life to follow Him faithfully, not to fear the world even if my body must perish. I prefer to know that God, the Almighty, is with me, even if it means that the whole world is against me." -Pastor Mehdi Dibaj.

So God chooses things the world considers foolish, well that would be me. I am foolishly, crazy in love with God, and if that means the world doesn't want anything to do with me, than I will make it more known and I will fall even more in love with Him, for with God there is no depth to his love. Nothing can measure the love He has for us. And if we stop for one moment in our worldly consumed day we would be able to feel and to realize a fraction of that love. Through the sunshine, the green grass, the wind on our faces. We must see Him in everything, because He is in everything.

My heart flutters with anticipation to see Christ in a little child's face. To hold and hug and love and comfort that child with all that I am. To know that I am may be considered foolish by the world, but to God I am His daughter, His servant answering His call. Answering the call of my Beloved. No one else can answer this call, because it was designed for me. And no matter how much I push the ignore button, or hang up on Him, He continues to call, because this is His design, His plan for my life. And no one can get in the way of that. No family, No man, No friend, Not even SATAN can separate me from my Love, my Father in Heaven, because He is where I am, He is everything I need. Everything I have. Everything I want.

The Lord, my God. He knows me, He loves me, it's Him I cling to, it's Him I desire to see, and in Him I am what I am.

HIS and yours,