Two weeks

In two short weeks I will be leaving home and headed to Africa. Words cannot even explain the excitement I am feeling in my heart right now. The fact that I am going to be living out my dream in two short weeks has not yet hit me and I don't know what will happen when it does. A lot has been going on in this short month that I have been home. Many battles within myself and also among people. It's hard to come back to my "hometown" because I know I do not belong here anymore. That it is time for me to move on from this place and the people here. God is calling me somewhere else and I want to be where He takes me, because in all truth, that is where I belong.

I can constantly feel myself changing and growing. A guy I have a couple classes wrote this "Christian spirituality is like jazz music. Loving Jesus is something you feel. It is something very difficult to get on paper. But it is no less real, no less meaningful, no less beautiful." That is the best way to describe me. I feel Christ moving through me, guiding me, showing me where I am supposed to be. And sometimes it gets tough, because the world does not understand. God deliberately chooses things the world considers foolish. Because God is not of this world and neither are we. We are designed to love and dwell with our King.

"Men choose a religion, but a Christian is chosen by Jesus Christ. To be a Christian means to belong to Christ. Jesus asked me to renounce even my life to follow Him faithfully, not to fear the world even if my body must perish. I prefer to know that God, the Almighty, is with me, even if it means that the whole world is against me." -Pastor Mehdi Dibaj.

So God chooses things the world considers foolish, well that would be me. I am foolishly, crazy in love with God, and if that means the world doesn't want anything to do with me, than I will make it more known and I will fall even more in love with Him, for with God there is no depth to his love. Nothing can measure the love He has for us. And if we stop for one moment in our worldly consumed day we would be able to feel and to realize a fraction of that love. Through the sunshine, the green grass, the wind on our faces. We must see Him in everything, because He is in everything.

My heart flutters with anticipation to see Christ in a little child's face. To hold and hug and love and comfort that child with all that I am. To know that I am may be considered foolish by the world, but to God I am His daughter, His servant answering His call. Answering the call of my Beloved. No one else can answer this call, because it was designed for me. And no matter how much I push the ignore button, or hang up on Him, He continues to call, because this is His design, His plan for my life. And no one can get in the way of that. No family, No man, No friend, Not even SATAN can separate me from my Love, my Father in Heaven, because He is where I am, He is everything I need. Everything I have. Everything I want.

The Lord, my God. He knows me, He loves me, it's Him I cling to, it's Him I desire to see, and in Him I am what I am.

HIS and yours,


Cami