Sunday, April 15, 2012

4 weeks...the Road Less Traveled (Frost, Whitman, Thoreau)


"I see my path, but I don't know where it leads. Not knowing where I'm going is what inspires me to travel it." -Rosalia de Castro.


I have to say it's been a crazy, stressful, draining week. The weird thing about this week, I found myself thinking about my junior year high school English class. Random I know. I was quite the English nerd in high school, I'd like to think I still am on occasion, but I found myself thinking of writers that inspired me while I was in high school, Frost, Thoreau, Whitman. Their words sparked a passion in my heart not only to write but to live. And as I'm about to embark on some crazy journey that God is guiding me on, their words seem to surface to the forefront of my brain while I lay in bed at night thinking.

"If one advances confidently in the direction of one's dreams, and endeavors to live the life which one has imagines, one will meet with a success unexpected in common hours" -Henry David Thoreau.

Well I officially have 2 weeks left of classes, a dead week, and then the week of finals, and then I graduate college. Wow. It's crazy how much has happen, how things have changed. My dreams, goals, ambitions, friends, and me. I have changed. I have learned to go after the things I desire. To stop sitting around and waiting for things to happen, but going out in prayer and in trust in God and making things happen. Whether jobs, friendships, speaking, traveling. It doesn't matter, but that God has continued to guide me and change me, my passions and my dreams to shape the future He has for me a future that many will not travel.

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference" -Robert Frost.

It's true the road that God has mapped out for all of us is a narrow one, is one that many people choose to turn away from, to not follow. But choosing that road it does make all the difference. It changes you, it makes you a better person than you could ever be on your own. It gives you courage, passion, love, and a God who knows you better than you know yourself. He is constantly calling us to this road, to follow after Him in His steps. I constantly find excuses to ignore Him, trying to give my heart away to other things rather than to the Lord of all. But I have learned that the safest place for my heart and for my whole life is in the hands of God. One I can't afford to give my heart away because my heart is meant for Him and Him alone. Two, He has placed my heart somewhere else. And in four short days I will have an interview that will determine if that is where I will be heading this next season of my life.

"Not I, nor anyone else can travel that road for you. You must travel it by yourself. It is not far. It is within reach. Perhaps you have been on it since you were born, and did not know. Perhaps it is everywhere- on water and land" -Walt Whitman.

God is calling all of us to different places. I continually think it's not fair. It's not fair that I have to leave this place that I've spent the past 4 years of my life at. Leaving my friends and my family behind. And I think is there not someone better than me to go God? But no, He has called me, the calling has been placed on my life, not anyone else. He doesn't need me to go, but He is asking me to go. And who would I be to ignore Him, the one who has given me life and blessed me with these friends and the family I will leave behind. The truth is, I'm scared out of my mind, I cry nightly, and laugh and scream, and worry. But doing all those things only means that I need to put more trust in God to guide me through all of it, no matter what happens, no matter where I end up.

And maybe if you're reading this you're feeling the same thing too. I don't know if people actually read these, if people actually care, But I know God can use anyone and anything to touch people's hearts. And even if no one sees these, God has used my ability to write to speak to my own heart. But for some strange reason you've found yourself here, reading the inner workings and rambling of my brain and heart. I just have to say. thank you but more importantly thank God. and I urge you to listen, listen to Him whispering your name, calling you to Him, calling you elsewhere. To a life of LIVING. to a life of fullness, of joy, of love. He has is it all. Trust Him. There is no better way.

It's tough. I'm not going to pretend it's not, there are times i just want to give up throw in the towel and say forget it. But if I were to give up I'd never be graduating college in 4 weeks. I'd never have the friends I have today. I would never have the faith I have now. I wouldn't be here on this earth. And for all of the blessing and the love and the road I am traveling on I thank God. Because He is all together lovely. He is my all in all, my Everything. and In this life no matter who I am with, where I am. He is always with me and He is all I need.


Walking the Road Less Traveled,


 HIS and yours,

  Cami





“This is what you shall do; Love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches, give alms to every one that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence toward the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown or to any man or number of men, go freely with powerful uneducated persons and with the young and with the mothers of families, read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life, re-examine all you have been told at school or church or in any book, dismiss whatever insults your own soul, and your very flesh shall be a great poem and have the richest fluency not only in its words but in the silent lines of its lips and face and between the lashes of your eyes and in every motion and joint of your body.” 
 Walt Whitman




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